Traveling Home

Since the point of this blog is to show that there is more to life than having kids, this entry is about my trip home to Iowa last week.

I left the house very early Friday morning & arrived at the airport to start boarding the plane. When I got to the row my seat was in, my seatmate was the worst possible person to have to sit next to...an old fat man! I mean one step lower is a beautiful skinny woman in high heels (why do people wear high heels when they are flying?). All she would have done is reminded me the whole flight how plain Jane I am. The best flying seatmate is the skinny cowboy! They always let you have the middle arm rest, they don't take up too much room, and they say things like yes ma'am with their southern drawl. No polite skinny cowboy for me! Even my connecting flight had another old fat man that took up too much room! I'm thinking "I left my husband in bed for this?!

When I finally made it to my parents house, I saw the full extent of my Dad's Old MacDonald's Farm. 100 Roosters (they were cheaper than chickens after all!), several ducks, around 75 chickens, 6 cows, 100 fish. Now you might be thinking, fish, don't they belong in water, and isn't it well known that the Erb's do not have a pond/lake/any type of body of water on their property?! Yes, you are correct! So my father decided to buy a swimming pool to put these 100 fish in it. The problem was that fish make a lot of waste & you can't treat fish water with the same chemicals that you would a regular swimming pool. So, Dad had to buy a second fish pool to use while cleaning the other pool! He also felt bad that the ducks didn't have a pond to swim in, so he got them a kiddie pool to play in. Since the roosters liked to fly over their fence so he decided to make it easier for them & built them a ladder to climb up & over the the fence. This may all seem pretty crazy to outsiders, & you are right! But it keeps them entertained.

Saturday we visited my Grandmothers who live near by. We made the must stop at the Kalona Cheese Factory to get the best cheese curds in the world! I got up to the counter & was browsing the different cheeses when I noticed a $20 bill in the case. I picked it up & asked around to see who it belonged to. It wasn't the little old lady to my left, or the large hairy man to my right. I turned it in to the clerk behind the counter & declared "I am not going to Church tomorrow, so I can't steal today." The man next to me started shaking with laughter.

Now, some of you may think that based on my previous posts, that I don't like kids. This is not true! I don't like annoying kids & the mothers that allow them to be annoying! The opposite of this is my cousin Angie who had a baby in January. This weekend I was able to meet her baby for the first time. This baby may possibly be one of the cutest children ever! She has these fat wittle cheeks that I found myself overly squeezing (and for some reason I could only call them wittle & not the proper word, little)! She has the cutest smile. You can already tell that she has a great personality. She was a very relaxed child, even when she wasn't feeling very good. I have never seen a crying baby that was smiling & still wanting to bounce up & down!

My maternal grandmother had recently been moved into a nursing home. I went to visit her. She had been living by herself since the early 1980's. So this was a big move for her & her independence. I was happy to encourage her. I personally can't wait to move into a nursing home (retirement community for my mother-in-law)! It is like my grandma has become a Queen with servants! She has a good attitude, but it is still hard for her. At one point during our visit, the nurse came in to discuss getting more depends for her. My grandma was a bit embarrassed & said to us that when she was our age she never thought she would have to wear depends. I told her not to worry about it! I wear pads everyday because sometimes when I sneeze or laugh, I pee a little! And I haven't even had any children! That made her feel better.

One of the last events in Iowa was going to the Mill to hear my brother & his band perform. They weren't going on stage until 10:30pm. Now this is where my old age really shows. I used to not go out until 10 or 10:30. This time I had to take a long nap that afternoon just to be able to be awake at that hour! On the way there, all I could think was how ready for bed I was. Once they took the stage, it was so worth the loss of sleep! I was so proud of my little baby brother! He was funny, the songs he wrote were really good, and he is an amazing musician! I guess it didn't hurt that the performer that went before him was so bad that the audience was actually laughing! As an added bonus my cousin Nevin came to the bar since he heard that we were in town. He is one of the funniest people I know, & provided great entertainment before my brother got on stage! That night was a lot of fun with my family! But it was nice to finally get into bed.

Oh am I getting old, but better every year!